Fantasy Year in Review: 5 Keys to Team Weiss Victory


The Weiss Blueprint.

After weeks of trash talk, side bets, booty pics, and alcohol, Team Weiss won our Boldin Beautiful fantasy league. Congratulations. Here is our analysis of why the lucky SOB secured his fantasy football victory.

1. Underrated Draft Picks

Team Weiss did not have a favorable draft position, so her pivoted. He drafted a deep roster that paid huge dividends as the season went on. Props for his selections of Chicago Bears RB Matt Forte, Eagles RB Darren Sproles, and TE Antonio Gates.

Matt Forte #22 of the Chicago Bears runs against the Seattle Seahawks at Soldier Field in December 2012 (Photo by Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images)

2. Perseverance

Team Weiss understood the fantasy season is a marathon and not a sprint. Joshua didn’t panic after losing his first two matchups. Less experienced owners would have lost their shit and made crazy moves to gain a win.

3. Booty for Days

After his 0-2 start, Josh didn’t lose again until Week 12. During the streak, Team Weiss’s team logo was the image of Deelishis, the curvy urban model. Deelishis’ real name is Chandra Davis.


4. Luck of the Draw

Team Weiss only faced Team Marin twice in the regular season. In their first matchup, Team Marin lost by 8 points when he left QB Tom Brady on the bench. In Week 12, Team Marin’s fantasy backfield of Tom Brady and LeSean McCoy led the team to victory. The win ended the nine-game Weiss-winning streak.

5. All the Right Moves

Team Weiss stepped on Team Marin’s throat in Week 1 of the Championship round. Joshua’s starting quarterback Cam Newton scored 22 points and Chargers’ TE Antonio Gates turned back the clock and scored 21 points. By Monday night of Week 16, the fat lady had sung. Team Marin had lost.

Cam Newton on October 25, 2015, in Charlotte, North Carolina.

Congratulations Team Weiss. Your league win finally got the column inches it deserved. I guess what they say is true, size does matter.