Deep Space Nine: Our Fantasy Football League Winner

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To the Victor Goes the Spoils

We have to admit, when your team doesn’t make the playoffs and only won three matches, it is hard to be enthusiastic for the rest of your Fantasy Football league. But as true journalists, we are responsible to report the facts. Deep Space Nine is our winner. Deep Space Nine is the Commish’s brother-in-law from Buffalo. Congratulations on your windfall and for beating the other Latino in our league, Team Velez. However, we smell a conspiracy, a C-O-N spiracy!

So Close but So Far

Joel, we were rooting for you to keep our trophy downstate, but you came up short. That is in no way a comment on Joel’s height. Next year, he hopes to fbe tall enough to ride the coasters at Six Flags. Team Velez lost the championship because of his starting backfield of “Big Ben” Roethlisberger and Matt Forte. Combined they scored 11 points. QB and RB duo Russell Wilson and Adrian Peterson scored a combined 35 fantasy points for Deep Space Nine. Ouch, it must suck when the double team of Forte/Big Ben screws you over…See what I did there.

First and Ten Sports reached out to Joel for comment, but at the time of our deadline, no response was given. Update: After taking some time to compose himself, Team Velez spokesperson Joel Velez who said,

Congrats to Team Corn [sic]. As all true Mets fans have uttered since the beginning of time, wait ’til next year.”

Poor guy, Velez is so upset about the loss, he didn’t realize he lost to Team Marino, not Team Corn. Also, we haven’t forgotten about the Commish. He had TWO wins for the season and will bear the shame of coming in last place for 365 days. Here are some stats to understand how Deep Space Nine secured the victory.

Team Marino averaged 85 fantasy points a week. Deep Space Nine had the third highest scoring QB for the season, Russell Wilson. Adrian Peterson was the second highest scoring RB in the league and WR Doug Baldwin scored the seventh most points at the position. Props to Mr. Marino and you will have a hungry pack of team owners coming for your crown next season. Also, can we borrow a few bucks? The holidays tapped First and Ten Sports out. Live long and prosper.