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Fantasy Year in Review: Always the Bridesmaid, Never the Bride

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You Blew It.

There was a reason why the FTS head writer called his fantasy team “Me Seahorny.” Experience has taught him an important lesson–he is not a great closer. He drives hard out of the gates but often loses in the end. Case in point. Team Marin placed second in both his Boldin Beautiful Fantasy League and Pro Pick’em contests. He lost to Team Josh and to Team Vega respectively. DAMN.


Too Nice?

The other members of the league felt Team Marin shouldn’t fall on his sword so easily. They implored him to shade the crap out of Josh and Larry. Richie “Dick” Burns reached out to Pablo for comment and he said,

You two pricks are lucky I was distracted by holiday family drama and my end of year work projects or I would’ve beaten each of you like you stole something. I may have lost in the end, but once again I proved who is the real sports genius of our group. I’m coming for blood next year and FTS will be there to cover each step of my journey towards immortality.

We need to remind Team Marin that close only counts in horseshoes. The good news is that he is sick with the result and feels no pride in coming close. He is furious and is counting down the days to next season’s draft. For now, he will just have to be content to be this year’s league bridesmaid. Congratulations to Josh and Larry–-you bastards, from FTS.


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